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Georgia on my mind

August 6, 2006

(that song is playing in the hotel lobby right now)

What a week… I’ve worked every day since Monday and don’t finish until tomorrow afternoon. These last four days, especially, have been a constant personal pep talk. I tell myself, I don’t know how I’m going to do this. I can’t do 5 more flights. I can’t do that many more announcements… Then I tell myself, Grace, you don’t have a choice. You have to do this. Then I feel like crying, but people worry when their flight attendant cries so I don’t. And I’ve learned it doesn’t really help at all.

This morning I woke up late. It was 0521. I’ve been worn down physically and emotionaly for days. I think I’ve slept one night at home in the last week. I’ve seen one person I know in the last 3 days. Have hardly talked to anyone, but honestly don’t have the energy to talk to anyone. It’s weeks like this that make me wonder how long I can do this job. I have to remind myself I’m just tired. This isn’t how it always is. It’s the beginning of the month so I got integrated which means I work 8 days in a row instead of the usual 3 or 4.

We flew back from Kalamazoo at 630 this morning and when we landed in Atlanta I was having the same back and forth conversation with myself. Somewhere along the way I remembered I don’t have to handle these things on my own. I know there are places in Psalms where it says that David encouraged himself. It’s kind of a funny thing, but sometimes there isn’t anyone else to do it. The Lord reminded me of several verses – I can do all things through Christ… if I wait on the Lord He renews my strength, I’ll mount on wings like eagles, run and not faint… I finally told God, I need something or someone to help me get through this. I only had 2 flights today which is great but it seemed like 2 too many. We had to switch planes when we got to Atlanta and the plane we got didn’t have the air working on the ground. They were working on fixing it so the captain told me to go inside and wait. So I did and took a little catnap. I woke up to see my good buddy Tom standing next to me. He gave me big hugs. It was so nice to see a familiar face and get a hug. Then I went out to the plane and the passengers came on. There was an old couple sitting in the front row. The man could hardly walk, but the lady was by him the whole time. They were pretty old but she always had her arm through his and her hand on his hand, stroking it and smiling and talking to him. They looked so happy together. I asked them if they were married and how long they had been married. She said 49 years!! I said well it looks like you guys still like each other. They both said they really did and that they laughed a lot together. It really cheered me up in a lot of ways. They were so happy, even after all these years.

This is a whole lot of nothing really. Just rambling. I’m still tired but I’m in Naples, FL and am trying to kick myself hard enough to find my way to the beach. I was going to go earlier but it started pouring down rain. I think it’s a few miles away, but I could use the exercise.

I hope everyone is having a blessed Sunday. It’s so easy to get bogged down by life and forget how good we/I really have it.

PS. If anyone knows of a place on the gulf that I could go chill with my sister for a day or two before she goes back to college let me know.

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